A journey to remember

A Heartbreak is Just About Time

Posted on: July 8, 2017

Patah hati ada banyak jenisnya. Ada yang terasa ringan, karena toh kita hanya sekedar “ngefans” sama si (mantan) gebetan. Ada yang lumayan berat, biasanya karena sudah mulai tumbuh rasa cinta dalam waktu yang cukup lama. Dan ada juga patah hati “kronis” yang butuh waktu bertahun-tahun hanya untuk bisa sembuh.

Apapun itu, pada dasarnya, patah hati hanya soal waktu. Cepat atau lambat, kita akan pulih dengan sendirinya. Konon katanya, semakin optimis kita bisa move-on, akan semakin sedikit pula waktu yang kita butuhkan untuk bisa betulan move-on.

Di awal patah hati, godaan untuk kembali mencoba akan masih sangat sering terasa. Masih sering maju-mundur, berubah-ubah pikiran, sering baper dan penuh dengan keraguan. Dorongan untuk terus mengamati kehidupan si mantan (entah itu tanya-tanya ke orang sekitar, atau mengamati diam-diam via social media) masih terasa begitu besar.

Seiring berjalannya waktu, ada kalanya kita mulai merasa bahwa kita sudah moved on, sudah semakin jarang stalking dalam bentuk apapun, tapi pada fase menengah, biasanya masih rawan baper. Masih bisa tiba-tiba merasa kangen, masih suka bernostalgia, dan masih sibuk bertanya-tanya apa yang salah dan apakah masih bisa diperbaiki segala “kerusakan” yang ada.

Pelan-pelan, lama kelamaan, tanpa disadari, kita sudah moved on dengan sendirinya.

Kita sudah tidak ingat lagi kapan terakhir kali mengintip Instagram si mantan. Sudah tidak lagi berusaha mencari tahu apakah si mantan sudah punya pasangan baru. Sudah bisa mengingat atau menceritakan kenangan masa lampau tanpa ada rasa sedih yang mengiringi. 

Waktu menyembuhkan, dan usaha untuk move on akan mempercepat. Usaha apa saja? 

Usaha untuk tidak meninggalkan unfinished business. Jika masih ada yang terasa mengganjal, tanyakan langsung kepada orangnya.

Usaha untuk menghibur diri. Boleh berduka, tapi ada batasnya. 

Usaha untuk meyakinkan diri bahwa kita baik-baik saja. Patah hati bukan akhir dari segalanya. Fake it until we make it. 

Terus berusaha, lagi dan lagi, sampai tanpa kita sadari, kita sudah tidak lagi menganggap si mantan cukup penting untuk hidup kita ini. Atau bisa jadi, tanpa kita sadari, sudah ada orang baru yang mengisi hati dan pikiran kita saat ini 😉

Mau satu tip tambahan? Coba bilang begini sama diri kamu sendiri, “Semakin lama saya patah hati, semakin lama saya bisa menemukan the one.”

Moving on is not just a myth. Keep trying, and you’ll get there.

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It’s very important to feel content about our own life. No matter how hard we try, the truth is, we will NEVER get EVERYTHING we want to have in life. I want to have more curves, I want to have a pair of cheekbones and a chin like a supermodel, I want to be married at 30 years old, I want to be a Math expert, I want so many things in life and some of them are just some mission impossible. It’s true that I’m a go getter, but I simply have no time nor resource to pursue everything I want in life. There are some things that I need to live with it probably for the rest of my life. But you know what? I never regret any of that. I would rather count my blessings rather than feeling sorry for my imperfections. I’ve tried to make the very best of every day in my life, and for me, that is way more than enough. I’m happy just the way I am, and I’m thankful for everything I have, everything I don’t have, and everything that I will never have.
Be a better you, for you. Dress up, wear heels, put some make-up on, for you. Live in your dream, be awesome in what you do, especially for you. Learn from your mistakes, get back up from your downfalls, for you. Be kind, be compassionate, also for you. Make yourself proud for being the very best of you, not to please anyone else but you.
Every people has their very own insecurity. They have flaws, failures, they all once did a couple of things they are not proud of. They have one soul crushing events they wish to forget. Their life is not perfect and nor is mine. I am no different with any other person I know. If there’s one thing I do differently, that one thing that many people is reluctant to do, is that I forgive my past. I accept my flaws. I make peace with my guilts and failures. It’s all simply because there’s nothing I can do to change everything that has happened back in my past. What’s gone is gone, I can only decide what I would like to do on the days to come. Rather than drowning in miseries, I moved on. I’ve seen many people turned their problems to a nightmare. They made their worst moments in life even worse than it should be. They pointed fingers, they blamed random innocent people, they pushed people away, they ran off from reality, they did nothing useful for their own life. Some of them even made their personal problems as someone else’s problems for no particular reason. They let their insecurities hurt people who has nothing to do with their downfalls. My life is no better nor easier than anyone else, but at least, I’m trying so hard to make my own life a better place. If I can do it, and so can you!

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What my blog is all about? It's all about my life; my very own fairy tale, that I would love to share. This is my story, my ups and downs, it's a journey to remember.

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