Category: Love Story

How do I Know that I Like Someone New?

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Belum lama ini, gue mengajukan pertanyaan sederhana ke salah satu teman gue, “How do you know that you like this guy?” Pertanyaan yang kemudian, diam-diam gue tanyakan pada diri gue sendiri. Bagaiamana dengan diri gue sendiri? Bagaimana gue bisa tahu bahwa gue suka sama seseorang?

Jika pertannyaan yang sama diajukan kepada gue, berikut ini jawaban gue:

  1. Gejala paling awal: gue jadi sering mikirin dia;
  2. Gue mulai nervous kalo ada dia. Hal-hal yang bisa dengan mudah gue lakukan dengan orang lain, seperti say hi duluan, akan jadi terasa lebih sulit dan bikin nervous;
  3. Gue jadi bersemangat kalo tahu akan ketemu sama dia;
  4. Gue mulai penasaran sama cewek-cewek di sekitar dia. Itu pacarnya bukan ya? Giliran bukan cowok yang gue suka, belum tentu gue tahu mereka itu single atau taken…
  5. I will be very curious when he’s not around. Mesti nahan-nahan diri buat enggak tanya-tanya ke orang lain, “Dia di mana ya?”
  6. His opinion does matter to me. Gue jadi suka berpikiran, “What will he think if I wear this dress?” atau “What will he think if say this or do that?”
  7. Dia jadi kelihatan lebih lucu di mata gue. Jokes yang nggak lucu-lucu banget aja bisa bikin gue sampe senyum-senyum sendiri!
  8. Tahap terakhir di mana gue paling yakin kalo gue suka sama seseorang adalah saat mulai terlintas di benak gue, “How does it feel to be his girlfriend?”

And what about you? How do you know that you’re in like with someone new?

Is There Any Easy Way to Deal with Broken Hearted?

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broken heartAn old friend once asked me, “What should I do to get him out of my mind?” Or, to move on and leave him behind. To start fresh. To get back the days before our heart was broken into pieces.

I wish I had a good answer to this question. I wish I knew how to make this moving on thing easier for us. But no… It’s sad but no, there is no such a thing like an easy way to deal with broken hearted. We only need to get used to it until finally, someday we will just know that we’ve moved on already.

We need to get used to his absence in our lives. There’s no more him to listen to our stupid stories. There’s no more him to enlighten our days. There’s no more him to look forward to, ever. We need to live with the fact that things will never be the same again.

Or if we fall for someone that we can’t have, all that we need to do is giving up our hopes. Let it go. He may be there for us, he may make us laugh, he may be everything we want from a guy we love, but he may never be ours. Be strong enough to accept the fact that he doesn’t belong with us.

I know that there’s a lot things we can do to get rid of him. We can hang out and have some fun, we can also try to find someone new, yet at the end of the day, everything is nothing if we’re still hoping that he will find his way back to us.

Moving on will never be easy. There is no magic that is capable to make us forget him in a blink of eyes. This is one of the times we learn that we can’t always have what we want to get. This is how we learn to live with a big heart as a wise grown-up.

Just hang on, be strong, and we’ll get there. Someday, we will wake up in the morning, look back, and smile ourselves knowing that we have gracefully left that past behind us.

10 Things I Always Like from a Guy

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The more and more I think about it, the more I know the things that I always like from a guy. A combination of ten things listed below will make myself end up falling for someone. And the more I think about it again, I believe it’s not only working for me, but also for millions of girls out there. Must read for the guys, these are the things that will make you loveable 😉

  1. He knows how to console me and how to make me laugh, especially in my very bad days;
  2. Knows the details about me: what I like, I dislike, the things I do and I will never do, then… it will be nice if he lets me know that he knows me well;
  3. Gives up his seat for me, holds the door, carries my heavy boxes… you know, the gentleman things will never get old;
  4. Offers me some help when I need the most without being asked. It will make him some kind of superhero, hehehehe;
  5. Successfully solving my problems that I’m still struggling with. It just impresses me;
  6. Trying so hard to fulfilling his promises to me. It’s hard to find nowadays so that it impresses me too;
  7. Looks for me when I’m not around. It will let me know that I matter to him. It may not apply in certain conditions such as working environment though;
  8. He doesn’t yell me back when I’m so angry to him. It touches my heart and cools me down in no time;
  9. Treats me differently. I like nice guys, but he MUST be nicer with me rather than any other girls. It’s important to make me feel special 😉
  10. He knows how to flirt without being cheesy. I love it more when he flirts and makes me laugh in the same time. The more creative he is, the more chances he steals my attention.

The Beauty of Falling in Love

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I don’t know why but people always get me wrong when I look bright and happy and smile a lot more than I usually do. They think I’m happy because:

  1. A promotion at work;
  2. Salary increase;
  3. I’m about to travel somewhere soon;
  4. Just had a new bag;
  5. And so on… except the fact than I’m currently falling in love.

I don’t understand why some people think I’m not interested to fall in love. A colleague once asked to my best friend, “Isn’t she interested to find a man? She’s very dedicated to her work.”

Oh well… of course I do. I really do. I want to find a way back into love but I don’t spend my times wasted just to figure out the things I should do to get a boyfriend anytime soon. I think it explains why people never guess my happiness as an effect of falling in love. Yes, I can be happy with my achievements at work, with my upcoming trips and so on, but sometimes, I’m happy because I’m just falling in love too.

Falling in love makes the hardest days become easier. Make the burdens on my back even lighter. Why? Because it distracts me from the sorrow I’ve got to face in life. It makes my heart feel warm, flutter, it gives me some more things to look forward to. Looking forward to meeting him, to his texts, to his calls… The heartbeat when I saw his name on my screen is just priceless!

When I fall in love, I cherish every little moment I have with him. Even a simple hello will always make my day. A joke will sound twice fun to me if it comes from him. I can’t help myself smiling alone just by remembering our stupid conversations. Call me stupid but I do reread our old conversations when he’s not around, and again, I’m giggling alone like a teenager.

Dressing up and putting some make-up on my face is never as fun as when I know that I will meet him soon. I usually dress up only for myself, but then, the thought of what he will think of me will also count. I will only smile and say thanks when some random guys say I look pretty, but if it’s being said by him, the world has never been as beautiful as that moment.

I have so many reasons to be happy and to be thankful in life, but I won’t deny that falling in love always makes my life even more remarkable than before. There’s nothing can beat the beauty of falling in love.

So guys, next time please make a better guess. If you see me stay calm in the situation that usually drives my rage, if you see my eyes sparkling when I talk, or if you catch me smiling alone when I walk, well… there’s a possibility that I’m in love. I’m not that cold anyway, hehehehe.

My Kind of Guy

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Berawal dari pertanyaan seorang teman beberapa hari yang lalu, gue jadi serius berpikir tentang tipikal cowok yang gue suka. Fisiknya harus tinggi? Naksir yang lebih pendek pun gue udah pernah. Harus cowok pintar dan sukses? Naksir cowok yang termasuk lemot pun, kalo diinget-inget ternyata pernah juga. Lalu harus cowok yang terkenal baik hatinya? Naksir cowok raja tega pun ternyata udah pernah juga!

Kenyataannya, gue enggak pernah benar-benar tahu tipe cowok seperti apa yang selalu gue sukai, sampai akhirnya dua hari yang lalu, ada satu kejadian sederhana yang membuat gue berhasil menemukan jawabannya. Dalam sekejap, gue langsung bisa ‘merumuskan’ kesamaan di antara cowok-cowok yang pernah gue sukai. Dan ternyata, jawabannya sangat sederhana!

Yang paling pertama, gue suka sama cowok yang bisa nyambung ngobrol sama gue. Harus tipe orang yang bisa bikin gue tanpa terasa udah ngobrol berjam-jam sama dia. Tanpa perlu dipikir, percakapan akan terus mengalir dari satu topik ke topik lainnya. Kenyataannya, ini dia hal pertama yang gue lihat dari cowok yang baru gue kenal.

Setelah cocok ngobrol, gue akan dengan sendirinya mencari rasa nyaman. Rasa nyaman untuk menyampaikan isi pikiran gue, rasa nyaman untuk menunjukkan diri gue yang sebenarnya, dan rasa nyaman hanya untuk sekedar menghabiskan waktu dengan dia, lagi dan lagi.

Bersamaan dengan poin ke dua, gue punya ketertarikan yang konsisten dengan cowok yang bisa bikin gue tertawa lepas. Enggak mesti jadi cowok lucu yang dijuluki ‘badut kantor’, asalkan dia bisa mencari celah untuk melempar jokes yang bisa bikin gue tertawa lepas, itu saja sudah cukup. Apalagi kalo leluconnya sudah diselipkan dengan unsur flirting… asalkan jatuhnya terdengar pas di telinga gue, dijamin bikin naksir!

Yang paling akhir, ketika gue udah ngerasa cocok sama dia, nyaman untuk berada di samping dia, dan banyak terhibur hanya dengan keberadaannya, cowok yang akhirnya bisa bikin gue jatuh cinta adalah cowok yang bisa memperlakukan gue dengan baik. Perhatian-perhatian kecilnya, pertolongan tanpa pernah gue minta, atau sekedar menangkap basah dia yang sedang diam-diam memperhatikan gerak-gerik gue… aaah, bener-bener bikin hati luluh!

Hanya saja sayangnya, cinta memang tidak selalu datang pada tempatnya. Tidak semua cowok yang memenuhi kriteria di atas melakukan semua itu karena mereka juga memang beneran jatuh cinta sama gue. Sudah pasti mereka termasuk dekat dengan gue, teman baik atau rekan kerja terbaik yang gue punya, tapi bisa jadi, memang hanya sebatas itu saja.

Jadi kabar baiknya, gue tidak separah itu untuk urusan pilih-pilih cowok. Hanya saja kabar buruknya, itu justru bikin gue bisa saja terjatuh di tempat yang salah. Tapi, seperti yang pernah gue tulis di sini… tidak ada yang perlu gue sesali dari mencintai seseorang dengan tulus. Falling in love has created my own version of fairy tale. And according to that fairy tale, I may need to kiss a ton of frogs before I end up with my final prince.

Love It When You Have It

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Have you ever had a very best friend who used to know every little thing about you? The person you ran into everytime your life was falling apart, and the first one whom you called when something awesome just happened to you? It felt like you would be best friends forever with them, but then, they were just a stranger that you used to know. Now you don’t even know how their life is going, either they’re still single or taken, where they work, or maybe, you simply never see their face no more.

Have you ever loved somebody so deep that you thought you couldn’t imagine a life without them? The one who made you think you would do everything just to stay with them forever. The one that apparently was just temporary. Now if you think again, even if you had that second chance, you would never ever choose to get back together anyway.

Or have you ever loved your job and felt that it was exactly the place where you belong? You used to feel that you were so lucky to get that job, so excited waking up in the morning knowing that you would go back to work again. That one job that you never thought you’ll ever get bored. A job that finally starts to make you wonder, “Why am I still here?”

As a grown up, I’ve learned so many times that many feelings that heart can feel is temporary. It rapidly changes. From love to hate, from best friends to strangers. It was always beautiful in the beginning, but then it ended miserably.

So many years ago when I was still a little kid, a friend of mine told me, “My Mom said that I don’t need to look for a best friend. They don’t really exist. I’ll only be upset.”

As those many years passed me by, I never really listened what she said to me back then. I do believe in friendship. It’s just then I realized, not all friendship was meant to last forever. And it’s not only about friendship anyway. The job that felt right for me may no longer be a place I want to be in the next few years. The man I loved a lot may only end up as one of my ordinary good friends. It can happen in years, in months, in weeks, in days… I mean, who knows?

The hellos and good byes were there in our lives to make us learn. We learn what we did wrong that made them leave. We learn what we can and we can’t accept from people in our lives. We learn to appreciate the ones who stay with us with all our flaws. And the most precious thing, knowing that some things may only last for a while has made us learn to embrace every moment of our lives.

That’s why guys, don’t think too much. Keep making friends, keep making memories, keep falling in love, keep searching, simply keep living your life to the fullest! Cherish every second of your life as they may never ever happen twice. Believe me when I say, love it when you have it.

Have a great life!

2015 New Year’s Resolutions

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Biasanya, new year’s resolution gue itu nggak jauh-jauh dari: naikin berat badan, nyelesain novel, dapetin beasiswa, dsb dsb. Sampe lama-lama, gue bosen sendiri. Kayaknya, semua hal yang gue sebutin tadi itu emang akan jadi my lifetime’s project. Gue akan selalu menginginkan semua itu, but it takes a long way to go!

Makanya untuk tahun ini, gue kepingin bikin resolusi yang agak berbeda. Cukup tiga saja, tapi gue harap, gue bisa mencapai ketiga-tiganya di tahun baru ini.

Here are my three new year’s resolutions for 2015:

  1. Be a little bit nicer. Gue emang nggak akan pernah bisa jadi orang selalu senyum-senyum ceria, it’s just not in my blood. Tapi seenggaknya, gue kepengen lebih bisa mengontrol emosi gue. Ada rekan kerja menyebalkan? Pemalas? Kekanakkan? Tukang bohong dan tukang bikin excuse? Stay calm! Angry all the time will never solve my problems. Makanya, gue kepingin lebih sabar, sedikit lebih nice, dan marah-marah seperlunya aja, hehehehe;
  2. I want to update my blog much more often. Biasanya, gue bikin new post di blog ini sesempatnya saja. Padahal ada banyak ide, tapi nulisnya nanti-nanti saja. Padahal kalau dipikir lagi, kenapa harus ditunda? Writing always makes me feel happy. Jadi kenapa gue harus menunda melakukan hal yang bisa bikin gue happy? Target gue, dalam satu minggu, setidaknya gue bisa nulis 3 judul baru. Dan tentunya gue berharap, semakin sering nulis, semakin terkenal pula blog gue ini, hehehehe; dan
  3. I want to fall in love again. Di tahun 2014 ini, gue kembali ngerasain indahnya jatuh cinta. Senyum-senyum sendirinya, berdebar-debarnya, dan heboh-hebohnya cerita ke teman-teman gue tentang dia… Kemudian saat akhirnya perasaan itu harus berakhir tanpa sempat dimulai, barulah gue menyadari… “I’m happy with my life, but I’m happier when I’m in love.” Jadi, karena pada prinsipnya ‘I will do whatever makes me happy’, maka ‘kembali jatuh cinta’ udah jadi salah satu resolusi tahun baru gue 😉 Doakan terkabul! Dan semoga kali ini bisa happy ending juga tentunya, hohohoho.

Never Ever Regret for Falling in Love ;)

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Have you ever felt so unwanted just because of falling for someone who turned out didn’t feel the same way about you? Or feeling super stupid for falling in love with the one who belongs to someone else?

I’ve been there, but now I simply think that actually, I have no regret. I’m even grateful for ever felt such a genuine feeling to someone else.

Why should I regret if my feeling for him used to make me smile a lot back then?

Made my morning so beautiful just by waking up and knowing that I would see him soon.

Made me very much cherish every moment I shared with him. The laughter, the chats, even just a simple hello could bring me so much joy.

Not to mention the butterflies in my belly. The heart that skipped a beat. The warmth in my heart and the smile on my lips… I was the one who felt all of that beauty, NOT him. So what should I regret anyway?

Yes, at the end, it was not a happy ending. It broke my heart. The sorrow. The sleepless night. The thought of never seeing him no more…

But think again! Even a heart break has made me a better one!

I learned how to be strong. I learned from my mistake. I learned to let go and live with a big big heart. And I learned how to appreciate the ones who sincerely love me for who I am.

Again, it was me who learned all of those priceless life lessons, NOT him.

I read a few cool quotes about it a few weeks back. Everything in life is temporary. Love it when you have it! But if it’s not meant to be, then let it go. No need to regret, just let it go. Because when you sincerely let go, you actually give God some space to work.

Let go, have an awesome life, and happy holiday! 😉

Girls, Stop Falling for The Wrong Ones

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Girls, at some point, we should stop letting ourselves fall for the wrong ones.

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Don’t fall for a guy just because he told you that you look pretty that day.

Or when he keeps telling you how smart you are.

Or how different you are.

Or any other pretty things that anyone can say.

He may have that super charming smile.

He may always say hello and asking how your day is going.

He may always make you feel special.

Feel pretty.

Yet again, don’t fall for him in a blink of eyes.

Remember girls, talking is easy.

You may be not the only one.

He may just enjoys being friendly.

Or maybe, he just enjoys being the center of attention.

Hey may only say things and forget.

Hey may never really care to every word you say back to him.

Don’t fall for him, until you know for sure, that you are his center of attention.

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Don’t let yourself fall so easy to the gentle man.

The one who holds the door for you.

Who gives up his seats for you.

Who never lets you carry those heavy stuffs.

Who always makes you feel like a queen.

Maybe it’s true that he’s a gentle man, he’s a good man.

He’s harder to find these days.

But that’s it…

Maybe he’s just being who he really is.

Maybe he’s just being used to be polite.

Maybe that’s just the way he was raised, to be a gentle man.

So girls, don’t fall for him, until you know for sure, that you’re indeed the queen of his heart.

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Finally girls, don’t fall for a guy just because he’s always there when you’re in need.

Don’t let your heart melted when you saw him trying so hard just to help you out.

Don’t get him wrong when he’s being such a great listener for you.

Don’t think too much when you find he’s always around.

Because maybe, he’s just trying to be a good friend for you.

Yes, a good friend.

He may only does the things that the best friends usually do.

He helps you.

He cares about you.

He always listens while you speak.

Because that’s what a friendship is all about.

So don’t fall for him, until you know for sure, that he wants you to be his girl.

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Again girls, at some point, you may want to stop wasting your times for the wrong ones.

However sometimes, it’s not about the wrong ones, it’s the wrong decisions instead.

It’s our own wrong decision instead.

We fall too fast.

We fall too easy.

We fall before knowing what we’re running into.

We are blinded with so many ideas in our heads.

We keep making the same mistakes, over and over again.

We keep making the same ending, for ourselves, over and over again.

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In the beginning, it’s the mistake which made us learn.

It’s the wrong ones who made us know what we’re looking for in the right one.

However, at the end of the day, we’ve got to stop.

When it’s frustrating to feel a pain inside our heart.

When it’s exhausting to pick up the pieces for the hundreds times.

When we’ve started wondering what we always did wrong.

Then it’s the time for us to stop making obvious mistakes for ourselves.

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We are too valuable to feel rejected.

Life is too valuable to be wasted for more broken hearts all over again.

Learn from our past.

Learn from our mistakes.

And when we are about to fall for another wrong one.

When we are about to fall so quickly.

Just remember one of those days when a broken heart knocked us down.

Just remember that we are a grown-up, who have a total control of ourselves.

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Don’t fall too fast, until you know for sure, that you are running to your final stop.

AADC 2014 – Will You Ever Wait THAT Long?

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imagesJadi awalnya, gue rada-rada bingung kenapa beberapa orang temen di Path bikin posting tentang AADC. Awalnya cuma lihat-lihat sepintas, secara kerjaan di kantor lagi banyak-banyaknya. Tapi begitu tadi sampe di rumah, gue baru sadar… ceritanya LINE baru aja bikin short movie tentang kelanjutan kisah Rangga dan Cinta, 12 tahun kemudian.

Penasaran, gue langsung buka Youtube. Dan bener aja… video AADC 2014 itu langsung muncul di layar laptop. Tanpa pikir panjang, gue tekan “Play“.

Nonton dulu video-nya, di sini.

Hal pertama yang gue suka dari video ini adalah saat muncul tulisan “Ada Apa Dengan Cinta” diikuti angka “2002” yang lalu berganti menjadi “2014”. Gue jadi sadar… sudah 12 tahun berlalu sejak pertama kali gue nonton drama yang kemudian membangkitkan dunia perfilman Indonesia itu. Jadi ingat masa-masa SMA. Harus ngantri panjang demi dapat tiket nontonnya. Jaman-jaman ngikutin gaya bicara ala Cinta dan kawan-kawan. Dan tentunya, jadi ingat betapa cute-nya cinta monyet ala SMA dulu 😉

Hal ke dua yang melintas di benak gue… Seriously? Jadi setelah ending film itu, mereka 12 tahun enggak ketemu??? Rangga nggak pernah pulang lagi ke Jakarta selama itu? Dia ngelupain Cinta begitu aja tanpa ada kabar berita? No wonder kalo awalnya Cinta enggak mau bales LINE-nya Rangga! Saat lagi kesel-keselnya nonton short movie ini, gue lalu kepikiran. “Lho… bukannya dulu itu pernah ada kelanjutan AADC versi sinetron? Rangga-nya pulang lagi ke Indonesia bukan?” Tapi sudahlah. Anggap aja sinetron itu enggak pernah ada, hehehehe.

Hal selanjutnya yang bikin gue mengerutkan kening… Jadi cuma segitu aja, usaha Rangga buat dapetin lagi Cinta yang udah dia ‘terlantarkan’ selama 12 tahun lamanya? Hanya sekedar 2 baris LINE buat ngajakin ketemuan? Kesannya kok, kayak iseng-iseng berhadiah yah? Itu lho… kayak cowok-cowok galau yang kalo galaunya lagi kumat, suka iseng-iseng texting ngajakin ketemuan. Kalo mau ya syukur, enggak mau juga nggak papa.

Saat beranjak ke ending short movie di bandara, gue makin gemes aja. Again??? Cinta yang ngejar-ngejar ke bandara? Emang efek emansipasi kali yah… Jadi malah si cewek yang harus lebih usaha buat mulai suatu hubungan… Kenapa juga bukan si Rangga yang usaha ketemuan sama Cinta, face to face? Kenapa harus Cinta, lagi, yang usaha buat cari-cari jadwal penerbangan si Rangga lalu nyusul ke bandara?

Hal terakhir yang melintas di benak gue… Will you ever wait that long? Dan kenapa juga mereka berdua masih sama-sama single saat usia mereka udah masuk kepala 3? Apa iya karena emang mereka udah sebegitu berjodohnya gitu? And will you ever give someone a second chance after 12 years passed you by? A second chance for someone who terribly failed you 12 years ago?

Well... terlepas dari isi kepala gue yang nggak penting-penting amat itu, gue tetep lebih suka ending versi short movie ini daripada versi sinetron yang gue bahkan udah lupa gimana ending-nya itu. Senang rasanya melihat bagian dari masa remaja kita itu muncul kembali di depan mata, di saat semua pemainnya sudah beranjak dewasa. Bukan hanya reuni untuk para pemainnya, tapi juga reuni untuk semua penggemar setia 🙂

Sekali lagi pertanyaannya; will you ever wait that long?

Kalian pernah nggak sih… jatuh cinta sama seseorang yang lebih memilih untuk pergi? Sedih campur benci kenapa malah ditinggal gitu aja… Ngerasa nggak dikasih kesempatan… Kangen tapi gengsi kalo harus cari-cari dia duluan… Harap-harap cemas bakal dia duluan yang nyariin kita… Makin lama nggak ada kabar, mau move on tapi masih nyimpen harapan someday dia akan balik lagi… Mau move on tapi selalu ada aja yang ngingetin kita sama dia… Terus begitu, sampai lama-lama, harapan itu memudar dengan sendirinya.

Orang yang menjawab “iya” untuk pertanyaan gue di paragraf sebelumnya, mestinya bisa mengerti, kenapa pada akhirnya, Cinta memberikan kesempatan ke dua buat Rangga. Umumnya kita bisa mengerti, cinta yang tidak pernah diberi kesempatan untuk tumbuh, adalah cinta yang tidak akan pernah benar-benar mati. Bisa saja ada cinta-cinta selanjutnya, tapi cinta terpendam yang dulu pernah dipaksa mati itu, akan tetap tersimpan dalam lubuk hati yang paling dalam.

Dia akan selalu jadi cerita masa muda favorit kita. Dia akan selalu tersimpan sebagai impian yang terpendam. Dan dia… akan selalu menjadi bagian dari andai-andai yang melintas di benak kita. Sebuah andai-andai, yang hanya akan berakhir jika diberi kesempatan untuk mewujudkannya.

Untuk menutup tulisan ini, gue ingin mengutip satu quote yang gue dapat dari Pinterest: “It might take a day, it might take a year, but what’s mean to be will always find its way.”

Selamat 12 tahun Ada Apa Dengan Cinta!

P.S.: Nicely done for LINE Indonesia! I love love it! The best advertisement ever! Anyway, Dian Sastro makin cantik ajaa. Jadi iri, hehehehe.