Redefining My Dream Job

Jadi ceritanya, keponakan gue yang umurnya baru 3 tahun itu udah mulai pergi sekolah. Awalnya, Arfa enggak mau disuruh sekolah, tapi lalu di hari-hari berikutnya, dia justru semangat banget pergi ke sekolah. Tiap bangun pagi, saat Mami-nya bilang sudah waktunya Arfa sekolah, si ponakan langsung bangun tidur dengan penuh semangat.

Antusiasme Arfa mengingatkan gue dengan pekerjaan pertama gue dulu. Hanya pekerjaan freelance dengan penghasilan yang tidak seberapa, tapi seingat gue, hanya pekerjaan itu saja yang pernah membuat gue semangat untuk bangun di pagi hari. Gue penasaran ingin ketemu klien baru, atau, penasaran ingin menyelesaikan masalah yang belum berhasil gue pecahkan di hari sebelumnya.

Gue lalu jadi berpikir… Sebenarnya seperti apa sih, pekerjaan impian menurut gue? Gue mulai mengingat-ingat hari-hari yang pernah gue lewati selama lebih dari 7 tahun meniti karier… Pada saat-saat seperti apa gue paling menikmati pekerjaan gue selama ini?

Yang pertama, gue paling suka dengan pekerjaan yang memungkinkan gue untuk menuangkan ide-ide baru. Entah itu ide untuk hal yang benar-benar baru atau sekedar development idea untuk sesuatu yang sudah berjalan. Dan bukan hanya sekedar menuangkan ide… gue juga ingin ikut terlibat di dalam proses pengembangannya. It’s challenging and so much fun!

Setelah itu gue juga suka dengan tugas yang mengharuskan gue untuk memecahkan masalah rumit. Bukan sembarang rumit, tapi juga sesuatu yang akan sangat bermanfaat jika gue berhasil menemukan jalan keluarnya. Rasa puas setelah berhasil menemukan solusi yang terbaik itu betul-betul bikin ketagihan! Itu juga sebabnya gue paling enggak suka dengan pekerjaan yang sering berulang… Lebih baik gue dikasih tugas yang bikin stres daripada tugas yang bikin gue jadi bosan!

Selanjutnya, gue sangat menikmati interaksi dengan banyak orang. Hari yang penuh dengan jadwal meeting justru hari yang paling menyenangkan buat gue. Hanya sekedar a call over Skype pun bisa jadi warna tersendiri buat gue. Selain senang bertukar pikiran, sejujurnya gue juga senang ‘memamerkan’ isi kepala gue kepada orang lain. It just makes me feel good. Duduk diam di belakang meja 8 jam dalam 1 minggu non-stop hanya akan bikin gue jadi desperate!

Kemudian gue juga sangat senang bertemu dengan orang-orang baru. Gue senang mendengar cerita di balik perjalanan karier orang lain, senang berbagi pengalaman gue sendiri, dan gue juga senang belajar dari pengetahuan orang-orang yang baru saja gue temui. And don’t forget, networking is power!

Yang terakhir, gue pengen banget punya pekerjaan yang mengharuskan gue untuk sering-sering business traveling. Meski hanya kota kecil atau bahkan pedalaman sekalipun, selalu terasa lebih baik ketimbang datang ke kantor yang sama setiap harinya. Rasanya lebih tidak membosankan dan bisa memberikan lebih banyak pengalaman buat gue juga.

Nah, pertanyaannya sekarang… sudahkah gue menemukan pekerjaan impian gue itu? Jika belum, di mana gue bisa mendapatkan pekerjaan yang seperti itu?

Waktu kuliah dulu, saat ditanya cita-cita setelah kelulusan, jawaban gue gampang saja: ingin jadi auditor. Ternyata seiring waktu, yang sulit itu bukan menentukan profesi impian, melainkan pekerjaan impian. Barulah setelah itu kita pikirkan… profesi apa yang bisa memberikan pekerjaan impian kita tersebut? Hanya saja sayangnya, dibutuhkan bertahun-tahun pengalaman kerja untuk gue bisa memahami apa yang paling gue inginkan untuk perjalanan karier gue sendiri.

Once again, I’m a believer that finding a dream job is just like us finding a dream man. We’ve got to meet the wrong ones and it may take a while until we finally find the one. Until then, let’s make the best of the job that we already have, because who knows, it will bring us to that one job we’ve been looking for.

Good luck!

How Can’t We Love the Company We Work for?

Lots of people says recently to never love your company. Don’t love it because it may not love you back and bla bla bla. That kind of sense that I fail to understand. I just can’t get the point why shouldn’t we love the Company where we work?

I have so many reasons why we MUST love our company.

For starter, we spend at least 8 hours a day in that place, at least 5 days a week. How does it feel to spend that much amount of time in a place that you hate? It must feel like hell!

Second, we earn a living from the job provided by our company. Don’t you feel like dating or marrying a guy just for his money with no love included?

And the most important thing is that we learn and we grow during our tenures in our companies. I don’t know if it’s you, but to me, the companies I’ve worked has really made me who I am today. The ups and downs has made me wiser, the experiences has made me skillful, and the chances I’ve got has discovered the competence that I never thought I had in me. How can’t I love something that has given all of that good things into my life?

Say no more, I know how it feels when the pressures killing us inside. The politics, the drama, the crazy deadlines, and so on; you mention it, I know it. But again, all of those office disasters are just the things that make us learn. It’s a precious lesson that we didn’t get in schools. Not only it has helped us to become a better employee, but also it has made us a better person inside. Trust me, it will come in handy in our personal lives too.

Loving our company doesn’t necessarily mean we spend 24 hours with it and make it our priority on top of all other important things in life. That’s NOT my point at all.

Love your company by being proud for being a part of it. Love it by ALWAYS doing your very best at work. And always remember… your company is your identity; if you spit on it, you spit on yourselves. Love it by keeping its name clean. Watch your behavior as a professional, because whatever you do may represent the entire Company as well. That’s how you love your company.

Believe it or not, loving our company will actually do good to us instead of to the Company itself. It will make us eager to learn every detail about our job; the business, the environment, and so on. Such business acumen will really help us to become an achiever at work. And of course, someone who loves their company will naturally make them look loyal to the Company and wherever we work, loyalty point is always a big plus.

What if your company is a bloodsucker that makes you suffer? Well, before I’m suggesting you to move on, I would rather asking this to yourself again, “Is it really the problem with the Company, or maybe… it’s just you?” If you keep jumping from one company to another over and over again, then maybe, the problem is yourself.

Loving a company is just like loving our families and friends. None of them is perfect. They will annoy us, upset us, piss us off, stress us out… Yet at the end of the day, we’ve got to live with it. No matter where we work, it will be just the same.

I’m not saying that we’ve got to stay with that current employer for forever though. If our best effort to fit in just never works, then it’s okay to move on. I believe finding a dream job in a dream company is like finding a Mr. Right. They won’t be perfect but they’re out there!

Life is too short to be spent with the things that we hate. Either love it or leave it! Have a great Monday, folks!

My Sunday Thought

It might be sad but in fact, not everyone deserves their success at work. That kind of people that leaves us wondering… how could this life be so unfair?

Some people are easily on top because their dads owning the company. Or some kind of reputable people in the country. Some of them have proven that they deserve that tittles on their name cards, but some of them are simply the ones who make people think, “This is the generation where the empire will go down.”

I also spotted so many people going far and faster than everyone else just because they went to some school abroad. Vacancies for cool jobs in Indonesia sometimes only open for overseas graduates. I’ve worked with so many overseas graduates, even the bachelors or MBAs from ivy schools, but trust me, it doesn’t make them so smart that they deserve to lead the team. Some of them are indeed have learned so much more than us, but some of them are just the ones who apparently did not really do well in their colleges.

Another heart breaking reality is how a foreigner can be out of the blue our new boss at work. Some people from developed countries working in developing countries thinking that they know what they’re doing here. Some of them are amazing, but some of them are better going home. I’ve come to learn that it’s not about our nationalities, it’s instead our capabilities to prove ourselves.

I write this post not because I envy. I may be everything but envy. I simply want to share my thought that it happens. It happens and there’s nothing we can do to change this reality. There’s no such a spell that can reveal the ‘real’ them. Hating and hoping they will miserably fail is completely a waste of time. It is what it is and I’m afraid, we just need to live with it. Wherever we work, we may always find some people like them.

However, I’m not saying that it’s okay to let them win from us. It’s NOT okay to give up just because we were not born rich, not either born somewhere in western part of this world, not even believing that we would be nothing just because we only went to ordinary schools. Even though our countries and schools are a part of our identities, I’m a strong believer that they don’t necessarily define who we really are.

Even if we didn’t manage to study in a fancy school, it doesn’t mean we cannot get the fancy job we always dream of. If we also want to get into that fancy school, then go for it! We’ll get there, maybe longer and harder, but we’ll get there. And about the not-so-goof expatriates… just show them what a smart Indonesian we are! Learn from the good ones, but don’t be too much irritated by the annoying ones. At the end of the day, this is OUR country. They can’t be so cocky, they earn a living in our country.

So guys… never ever feel inferior for who we are. Do our best and be proud of it! Be so fabulous that people can’t ignore you. Make people want you! Do not envy, just grow gracefully and let people envy you back, even before you know it 😉

Have a great Monday and one great week ahead!

Tonight in Shell

Malam ini sepulang kerja, gue mampir dulu ke Shell dekat kantor. Pom bensin yang sudah biasa gue datangi, tapi baru malam ini gue memperhatikan sesuatu yang sangat menarik perhatian gue.

Seperti biasa, begitu masuk ke kawasan Shell, petugasnya mengarahkan mobil gue menuju tempat yang masih kosong. Awalnya, gue udah ngerasa ada yang berbeda dari petugas itu, tapi gue masih belum benar-benar sadar apa yang membedakan dia dengan petugas lainnya. Baru pada saat si petugas Shell itu datang mendekat ke kaca mobil, gue menyadari… petugas laki-laki itu hanya mempunyai satu tangan saja.

I knew that it was not polite to keep staring at him, so I tried to look away, but my bad, I couldn’t help myself looking at him once in a while.  

Sama seperti petugas lainnya, dia dengan cekatan mengisi bahan bakar mobil gue. Dia juga dengan cekatan membersihkan kaca depan mobil gue. He could do it as fast as his colleagues, and of course, with a bright wide smile on his humble face.

Dalam perjalanan pulang, begitu banyak pikiran acak menyerbu masuk ke benak gue.

I’m proud of him for doing his best at work.

I’m proud of Shell for giving him that job opportunity.

And I’m proud that tonight, I managed to learn that I need to complain a little bit less.

Gue suka mengeluh sama sakit kepala yang tiba-tiba datang saat pekerjaan sedang banyak-banyaknya. Mengeluh capek dan kurang tidur. Mengeluh soal mata berkantung, jerawat-jerawat kecil, kerutan halus di sekitar mata… Tiba-tiba saja, gue ngerasa manja. I tend to forget to count my blessing much more than I count my problems in life.

Gue tipe orang yang percaya bahwa setiap orang punya jalan hidupnya masing-masing. Gue juga percaya bahwa tidak pernah ada kerja keras yang sia-sia. Jadi tidak, gue tidak perlu merasa kasihan meskipun petugas Shell itu hanya punya satu tangan. I know that if he works hard, works smart, behave and do the right things at work, he will find his way to success in life.

He can do it, I can do it, all of us can do it. Just do our best, and let God do the rest.

Let’s call it a night and sleep tight!

My Appreciation to Lazada

IMG_4569Today is exactly one year since the very first day I started working at Lazada Indonesia. One year working with Lazada, one year I met with so many new colleagues along the journey. The colleagues who shared these crazy workloads together, the ones who have my back everytime this ‘world’ seems to turn against me, and also the ones who keep me laugh even in the worst possible times.

My highest gratitude goes to my team who have sincerely accepted me as their leader. This one team who understands how I can be so cranky early in the morning, how I can be so annoying when something goes very wrong; it’s simply a team who supports me to fight the barriers and run toward the finish lines. I am nothing without their hard works, their contributions, their long hours at work, and their patience to constantly deal with this ‘tough life’, all together as a team.

Despite all of my grumpy attitudes, I’m so thankful for having these bosses as my boss. They trust my capability more than I trust myself, they give me chances to grow and prove myself, and they do everything in their powers to help me out everytime I’m in a big trouble. We’re not always aligned, not always being nice to each other, but at the end of the day, I know that once again in my career path, I am blessed to have them as my bosses.

I’m also thankful for other teammates in my department, especially the ones who end up as my good friends along the way. The chit chat, the encouragement, the jokes and laugh that we share together are just priceless! Having a helpful colleague is one thing, but having a good friend is one other extraordinary thing in life. I rarely find a place where many people sincerely support each other with no envy.

I’m also lucky enough to have a few friends from other departments who helped me a lot during my early times working for Lazada. I knew nothing about e-commerce and all systems involved in it back then, but they were all glad to let me know how it worked, as detailed as possible. They were all busy, but they always had times to answer my questions, to solve my problems, and of course, to share that not-so-important ‘news’ in between.

The last one, I’m also glad to have a few colleagues in regional team that have helped me so many times in the past few months. Sometimes I bother them with stupid questions that apparently I can answer by myself, yet they are still willing to find me the answers to my questions. I’m also glad that we still manage to have a good laugh apart from our crazy pressures at work.

I know that the tittle to this post is my appreciation to Lazada, yet all that I wrote is the people who work with me. But the thing is, what does define a company anyway? Company is only a name written on a piece of paper, and why should I say thank you to a piece of paper? It’s the people who work with me that has made Lazada a company that matters to me.

So guys, even though it looks like I’m angry all the time, the truth is I’m so happy to work with you. And yes, if you think that I wrote about YOU in this post, then this post is indeed all about you 😉

Let’s keep on rocking!

There is No Such a Thing like “Perfect Timing” at Work

Baru-baru ini, gue ngerasa bahwa yang namanya “perfect timing” itu sebetulnya nyaris enggak pernah ada dalam dunia kerja. Berusaha cari “the right time” ujung-ujungnya malah bikin kita melupakan atau menelantarkan hal penting yang ingin kita lakukan tersebut.

Contohnya…

Kita ingin menegur kinerja anak buah yang kita anggap kurang teliti, tapi karena tim kita sedang sibuk kejar deadline, kita lantas berpikiran, “Jangan sekarang ditegurnya, supaya dia fokus dulu menyelesaikan pekerjaannya.” Lalu kenyataannya? Selalu ada saja deadline yang baru lagi dan lagi, sehingga pada akhirnya, kita malah jadi lupa untuk memberikan feedback untuk si anak buah. Akibatnya? Hasil kerja dia terus saja banyak salahnya karena dia tidak merasa ada yang perlu dia perbaiki.

Contoh lain, gue pernah menyarankan tim gue untuk ambil kursus Bahasa Inggris di luar jam kerja. Tapi karena masih masa sibuk, kita pikir ya sudah nanti saja kursusnya. Kenyataannya? “Nanti saja” terus menjadi “nanti saja”, kesibukan seolah tidak pernah ada akhirnya, sehingga lewat enam bulan kemudian, masih belum ada satupun yang memulai kursusnya.

Atau contoh yang terjadi sama diri gue sendiri… gue pengen banget ambil cuti panjang, pengen refreshing, pengen jalan-jalan… tapi gue pikir nanti saja kalau ini dan itu sudah selesai gue kerjakan. Lalu kenyataannya? Cuti gue terancam hangus sembilan hari 😦

So guys… if we always wait for the right time just to do the right things at work, then maybe, we will have no time at all. Who knows that tomorrow you’ll be much busier than you are today? I don’t know how it goes somewhere else, but in my workplace, that working madness just never ends.

Emang sih, sangat tidak mungkin kita melakukan SEMUA hal dalam satu waktu yang bersamaan. Yang namanya prioritas tetap selalu ada. Hanya saja kembali lagi, jangan jadikan ‘waktu yang tepat’ sebagai satu-satunya pertimbangan untuk menentukan prioritas. Do what you’ve got to do, no need to wait that right time to come and make your own time instead!

Work smart and make time to do what you need to do TODAY.

Work Hard When We Are Young

Gue sering banget mendengar curhatan dari para fresh graduates yang dilema dalam memilih pekerjaan pertamanya. Banyak yang kepingin coba kerja di consulting company atau KAP Big 4 buat yang lulusan akuntansi, tapi pertimbangan mereka selalu saja soal bakal sering lembur dan work-life balance.

Well, harus gue akui… pernah bekerja di salah satu Big 4 udah jadi plus point di CV gue sendiri. Hanya sampai Senior Auditor, tapi tetap sudah membuka banyak peluang karier untuk gue ke depannya. Gue tahu banget alasan para headhunter menghubungi gue karena klien mereka secara spesifik meminta kandidat yang pernah bekerja untuk Big 4. Di Lazada sekarang pun, si bos yang tahun lalu merekrut gue juga menjadikan hal yang sama sebagai pertimbangan. Jadi gue bisa bilang… mungkin, jika bukan karena pernah bekerja di EY, maka gue belum tentu bisa sampai ke senior managerial level di usia 27 tahun saja.

Memang sih, tidak semua lulusan Big 4 atau top consulting firm pasti sukses karier ke depannya. Bukan pula berarti kita enggak akan pernah bisa sampai ke top level jika enggak pernah bekerja jadi konsultan atau auditor di firma papan atas. Tapi kenyataannya, pengalamana kerja seperti itu memang benar bisa menjadi stepping stone terbaik yang kita punya.

Jadi kalo saran gue… jika memang ada kesempatan untuk kerja di top consulting or auditing firms, ya kenapa tidak? Kalau memang karier itu adalah salah satu prioritas utama dalam hidup kita, maka sudah tentu ada harga yang harus kita bayar. Gue berani bilang, tidak mungkin kita bisa sukses berkarier dengan hanya duduk santai dan nyaman setiap harinya. Malah sebetulnya, hal yang sama juga berlaku untuk orang-orang yang bekerja di perusahaan non-consulting. Ada perbedaan opini atasan terhadap karyawan yang pantang lembur dengan karyawan yang tidak suka hitung-hitungan dengan perusahaan.

So guys, work hard, especially when we are young. Di saat tubuh masih lebih kuat untuk pulang malam. Saat belum ada suami/istri dan anak-anak yang juga harus dipikirkan… Bukan berarti boleh malas-malasan kalau sudah lebih tua lho ya. Hanya saja, kalau masih muda pun sudah pemalas, bagaimana kalau sudah tua nanti? Dan ingat selalu… usia kepala 2 pada umumnya adalah usia penentu. What we have done in our 20-s will determine what we will become for the rest of our lives.

Jadi mulai sekarang, get up and work harder! Jangan menolak satu peluang emas hanya karena banyak lemburnya. Jangan kerja asal selesai tepat waktu saja. Make improvement! Give more contributions, new ideas, bring your Company to the next level! Dan yang nggak kalah penting, jangan bisanya hanya mengeluh dan mengeluh saja! Kita digaji bukan untuk mengeluh sepanjang waktu. Curhat tentu saja boleh, tapi jangan sampai jumlah curhatan kita itu melebihi jumlah kontribusi yang kita berikan kepada perusahaan.

Akan tetapi, jika buat kita karier justru tidak sebegitu pentingnya, jika kita sudah puas dengan pencapaian kita saat ini, maka ya sudah… the decision is yours. Nikmati hidup yang kita pilih dan jangan jadi orang yang mengaku sudah puas dengan hidupnya tapi malah menghabiskan begitu banyak waktu hanya untuk menjelek-jelekan orang lain yang sedang sibuk mengejar cita-citanya.

Whatever we choose, whatever we do, make sure that it all has made you proud of being you. Have an awesome life!

The Things I’ve Learned After Working for 7 Years

Seven years ago, I started my very first day in my career history. A freelance job in a small company, bus hopping from one client to another, worked on site during weekdays and worked on my thesis over the weekend. A first job that made me learn much more than a college can do. A job that made me learn how to speak, to be confident, to bring out all the best that I had in me.

Right after graduation, I made my dream come true: I worked as an auditor in a Big Four that I always wanted. Turned out that I didn’t want to do it for the rest of my life, yet I can’t deny that having this job in my CV has given me the opportunity to be the one that I’ve become. It’s the first place where I learned how to be an achiever at work, it’s the place where I learned how to survive in life.

Less than three years, I moved forward as a Company accountant. That new place was such a battlefield, it was that one tough place that made me find myself. I learned how to be strong, to be tough and unbreakable. I learned how I could wipe my tears and went back to my desk to finish my job by overnight.

Three years later, there I left again. I finally find a place that I enjoy the most. This new place feels like a different world to me. Though in the same time, it’s also the place where I learn to never give up. Trying to do my best has never been this hard before. It feels like if I can survive this, I can survive everything else to come.

Seven years I work, seven years I learn that the dreams will do come true. My very first traveling abroad, my first leather handbag, my dream car and a tiny apartment to look forward to. It’s also a seven years where I learn that I will never stop learning for the rest of my life. I have had so many ‘slap’ on the face that woke me up to become a better one. It was not only a seven years of hardwork and tears, it was also a seven years of laughter and joy.

Career anniversary is always important to me. It’s like a milestone, it’s a celebration of another year of life learning. Because for me, working is not only about earning a living. It’s not only about killing times and meet some new friends either. My career has been my identity, working hard is in my blood, it’s simply something that I can’t live without. It’s where I learn to live, learn to love, learn to let go, it’s where I learn how to be my best.

Hence apart from my complains, my rages, and my very bad mood in the morning, I am very much grateful for my career path. I may be in doubt about doing the same job until I get old, yet I know for sure that I should be thankful that I’ve reached this far. Being a Senior Manager when I was only 27 was indeed beyond my imagination. That’s why again, believe me when I say; it’s not easy to be me, but it’s fun! Hehehehe.

Happy seven years to me!

People Don’t Leave Companies, They Leave Managers… Is that True?

Sekitar dua atau tiga tahun yang lalu, gue pernah membaca quote yang isinya, “People don’t leave companies, they leave the managers.”

Quote yang di-share oleh salah satu teman Facebook gue itu langsung dibanjiri puluhan “Like” plus puluhan comments yang intinya mengamini isi quotes tersebut.

Pada saat itu, gue berpikiran. “Masa’ sih? Gue nggak pernah tuh, mutusin resign cuma gara-gara atasan gue.”

Ketidakpercayaan gue terhadap quote itu bikin gue melupakan hal tersebut dengan mudahnya. Sampai beberapa bulan yang lalu, ceritanya gue mulai bikin account di Linkedin. Dan ternyata… di Linkedin, quote yang sama terus menerus muncul di homepage gue itu!

Banyak colleagues yang klik “Like”, memberi comment, atau ikutan sharing quote yang isinya mirip-mirip. Saking seringnya quote ini muncul di Linkedin, ujung-ujungnya, gue malah berpikiran begini, “Mereka gampang aja bilang begitu karena mereka sendiri korban sakit hati dari bosnya masing-masing. TAPI, jika mereka sendiri yang berada dalam posisi atasan, apa iya mereka rela mengakui bahwa SEMUA bawahan mereka resign hanya karena kesalahan mereka sebagai seorang atasan?”

Awalnya, gue masih keras berpendapat bahwa tidak semua orang resign karena atasannya. Gue juga enggak bisa terima kalo ada yang bilang, semua bawahan gue yang udah resign itu akhirnya resign semata karena faktor kesalahan gue. Apalagi kalo yang resign itu karyawan pembangkang yang susah banget diaturnya…

Gue masih terus berpendapat demikian sampai akhirnya, gue menemukan artikel ini via Linkedin. Ada satu paragraf yang menarik perhatian gue, “But when they talk about ‘morale’, when they say ‘communication is poor’, when they express frustration at the lack of clarity for their career progression – they are telling you that it’s the leaders they are leaving. For it’s obvious, isn’t it? Leaders are responsible for morale, communication and career path.”

Selama tiga tahun duduk di kursi manajerial, gue sudah pernah empat kali kehilangan bawahan gue. Jumlah yang menurut gue cukup banyak secara total bawahan gue tidak pernah lebih dari 15 orang. Dan berangkat dari artikel tersebut, barulah pada akhirnya gue menyadari… mereka resign memang benar-benar karena kesalahan gue sebagai atasannya.

Gue langsung teringat dengan satu karyawan yang pernah bikin gue sangat kaget saat dia bilang kepingin resign. Salah satu karyawan terbaik yang tidak pernah terlihat mengeluh, yang sudah gue rencanakan jenjang karier untuk dia di perusahaan tersebut, yang akhirnya malah resign karena merasa takut stuck jika terus bekerja di perusahaan itu. Awalnya, gue nyalahin dia karena ‘tidak sabaran’, tapi sekarang gue sadar… salah gue juga yang tidak cukup peka. Salah gue yang tidak pernah membagi rencana-renanca development untuk masa depan dia di sana…

Setelah gue ingat satu per satu… barulah gue menyadari kesalahan gue sebagai manajer saat itu.

Mungkin bukan mereka yang tidak bisa menerima kekurangan gue, tapi gue yang kurang keras berusaha untuk memperbaiki kualitas diri sebagai pemimpin. Gue yang kurang keras berusaha untuk lebih sabar dalam mengendalikan emosi gue sendiri.

Mungkin bukan mereka yang pemalas, tapi gue yang kurang menyempatkan lebih banyak waktu untuk membimbing mereka.

Dan mungkin bukan mereka yang banyak maunya, tapi gue yang kurang menyempatkan diri untuk mendengar keluh kesah mereka.

Mungkin, seharusnya gue berusaha lebih keras untuk menjaga keutuhan tim gue sendiri. Karena pada akhirnya, sebagai pemimpin, sudah jadi tanggung jawab gue untuk lebih banyak mendengar, banyak memberikan supervisi, dan lebih banyak berupaya untuk memperbaiki diri.

Jadi sudahlah… meski berat, harus gue akui bahwa kepergian karyawan adalah satu tough reminder untuk memperbaiki kualitas leadership gue. Waktunya untuk instropeksi, waktunya untuk gue berusaha lebih keras untuk membangun ‘the dream team’.

Meski begitu, meski gue sudah mengakui kebenaran dari quote tersebut, di sisi sebaliknya, gue tetap tidak menyalahkan para mantan atasan sebagai penyebab resign-nya gue dari kantor-kantor terdahulu.

Bukan salah atasan jika gue ngerasa bosan setengah mati dengan pekerjaan di perusahaan itu. Bahkan, ketika gue resign dengan alasan merasa karier sudah mulai stuck, gue tidak 100% menyalahkan atasan yang tidak kunjung memberikan promosi yang sudah sepantasnya gue dapatkan itu. Gue malah mengumpulkan bermacam alasan yang mungkin sudah menghambat promosi gue sendiri. Gue bertekad dalam hati, “Di perusahaan selanjutnya, gue harus banyak memperbaiki diri, jangan mengulang kesalahan yang sama.”

Dan benar saja… berbekal dari past experiences itu, tidak lama kemudian, di perusahaan yang baru gue berhasil mendapatkan promosi yang sudah sangat gue inginkan tanpa ada hambatan yang berarti.

Jadi sebetulnya, gue memang bisa saja tetap menyalahkan semua mantan bos sebagai alasan resign-nya gue dulu. Mereka yang nggak peka, nggak kreatif dalam memberikan tugas-tugas ke gue, mereka yang nggak adil dsb dsb… Tapi kalo dipikir lagi, apa sih manfaatnya buat gue? Menyalahkan mereka enggak bikin diri gue jadi lebih baik! Sibuk menyalahkan orang lain akan bikin gue jadi lupa untuk berkaca dan memperbaiki diri gue sendiri.

Ya, gue akan tetap sesekali curhat begini dan begitu soal atasan-atasan gue. Ya, sesekali di masa depan, pastilah gue akan pernah terpikir untuk resign hanya karena atasan-atasan gue nantinya. Tapi satu hal yang gue coba tananmkan pada diri gue sendiri: kalau sampai gue resign hanya karena faktor atasan, berarti gue belum berhasil menjadi pribadi yang gue inginkan untuk diri gue sendiri. Kenapa begitu?

Karena seburuk-buruknya atasan gue, mereka juga yang telah memberikan kepercayaan untuk gue bisa berada di posisi gue sekarang. Dan gue tipikal orang yang percaya, seburuk-buruknya seseorang, pastilah ada sisi baik mereka yang tidak boleh gue lupakan begitu saja.

Menerima pola pikir seperti ini jelas bukan perkara mudah. Butuh kebesaran hati untuk mengakui kesalahan kita sebagai atasan saat ada karyawan yang memutuskan pergi sekaligus menahan diri untuk tidak semerta-merta menyalahkan atasan saat giliran kita sendiri yang memutuskan untuk pergi. Memang berat dan kesannya seperti menyulitkan diri kita sendiri, tapi coba ingat kembali… menjadi pemimpin memang tidak pernah mudah! It’s easier to be a boss, but it’s never easy to be a leader at work.

I’m not saying that we have to be a perfect leader. I’m not saying that we have to please everyone at work. Not either saying that I’ve been a good one myself. I simply say to all of us, including myself, to always see the big picture behind every resignation. Either it’s our employees or ourselves leaving the company, never merely blame that departure to someone else. We should take this opportunity to reflect what we can do to make ourselves a better one. It’s not about our employees, it’s not about our bosses, it’s always about ourselves.

The Rejections

One week ago, while I was lying on my bed with bad cough and high fever, I received an e-mail from a stranger offering a pretty interesting job opportunity. He found me through Linkedin, so I clicked his profile right away, interested to know more about him and his Company.

I was actually and literally very sick. I was too tired of my crazy working hours in the office. However, I was committed to myself. I would never leave something unfinished. I have a responsibility to finish that one big thing I’m doing at work right now. Besides, deep in my heart, I still like my job here, I’m still proud of being a part of this Company, and I still want to give it a try.

Without any further chance to get to know about the opportunity that knocked, I said no, again for a few times in the past ten months.  But this time, I don’t know why, rejecting this one reminds me to a few past opportunities that I pushed away.

Just like rejecting the guys who came close to me, rejecting a job offer is also never easy to me. There’s always that time where I wonder…

What if I was wrong? What if that was actually the best thing that I could ever have?

What if that company could be one big thing that I desire in the future?

What would I learn if took that job?

Who would I meet?

Where would I be?

What would I have?

And would I be happier if I were there?

It’s not that I regret the jobs that I finally ended up with. I know that I have achieved so much and I’m so grateful for it. But you know… no matter how awesome the life that you have, a wonder will always cross your mind once or twice in your lifetime.

So I don’t write this blog as an expression of regret, I write this to remind myself to always think before I make such a big decision in my life. I want to take that one decision that will not make me keep looking back at my past over and over again. I hope that I will never hope to turn back the times. Because sometimes, when we reject something, it’s not always their loss, it can be our own loss instead.

Think before rejecting, and once we make our mind, we have to do our best to make the most of it. Make sure that even if someday we do look back to our past, we can be the one who says, “I used to have that one option, but I’m proud that I chose this path. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have this decent life and I wouldn’t have met these people of my life.”

Make the decisions and grow awesome!